Fun_People Archive
15 May
Police Quotes
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon, 15 May 100 23:02:33 -0700
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Subject: Police Quotes
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Police Quotes
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"The handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after
you wear them awhile."
"If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
"So, you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write
anything I want on the ticket, huh?"
"Yes sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will
help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"
"Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again
or I'll give you another ticket."
"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or
not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
"Just how big were those two beers?
"Life's tough, it's tougher if you're stupid."
"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
"No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now
we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."
© 2000 Peter Langston