Fun_People Archive
8 May
The Elian Gonzales Drinking Game.

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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Mon,  8 May 100 11:37:34 -0700
To: Fun_People
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Subject: The Elian Gonzales Drinking Game.

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THE ELIAN GONZALES DRINKING GAME

Some are getting tired of this ongoing saga.  Since the media won't give
it a rest and move on, we recommend playing the following game during any
network or local news shows, "special reports," news magazines (i.e.,
Dateline, 20/20, etc), talk shows, or any other appropriate TV shows.
Guaranteed to make watching this story more entertaining or your money
back!

Beverages required to play the game: Each player must have a beer handy,
a liquor appropriate for pouring shots is also required (tequila or rum is
preferred).

Rules of Play

If a TV announcer says "Castro" everyone in the room must salute with their
left hand.  The last person to do so must take a shot. If anyone salutes
with their right hand accidentally, they also have to take a shot.

If the photo of the SWAT "gunman" is shown, everyone must act scared.  The
last person to do so must take a shot and then go into a closet until he
is "rescued" by another player.

If the TV announcer says "fisherman" everyone must press their palms
together and make a swimming move with their hands.  The last person to do
so must chug whatever beer remains in their glass.

If a child psychologist is interviewed everyone must stroke his/her chin
and say "I see".  The first person to do so becomes the "psychologist" and
gets to administer shots to any players he/she deems in need of mood
improvement.

During any interview of a Member of Congress, everyone must shout,
"bullshit!"  The last person to do so drinks.

If the TV announcer says "Miami relatives" everyone must shout out either
"Lazaro" or "Marisleysis".  A count is made of how many players said each
name.  Everyone who called out the more popular name has to take a drink
of beer.

Whenever the station goes "live to Little Havana" everyone must stand up
and dance.  The last person on their feet has to do a shot.

If Marisleysis is shown crying everyone must yell "knock it off" and then
take a drink of beer.

If Juan Miguel Gonzales is shown carrying his "other son" everyone must
yell "wahhhhh" like a baby for as long as they can on one breath.  The last
person to stop gets to pick a person to do a shot.

If Elian Gonzales returns to Cuba with his father, everyone shouts "Thank
God."  The game is then over.

© 2000 Peter Langston