Fun_People Archive
13 Oct
Curse Shortage

Date: Fri, 13 Oct 95 15:17:52 -0700
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: Curse Shortage

From: bostic@bsdi.com (Keith Bostic)
Forwarded-by: guy@netapp.com (Guy Harris)
From: Noli Me Tangere (Daphne Brinkerhoff) <IO20444@MAINE.MAINE.EDU>

Several people have commented on the dearth of good curses in the English
language, thus leading authors (some even SF!) to say things like, "I
winced in pain at the red-hot stream of invective flowing from his lips.
'Boy,' I said, 'if God was listening we'd all be dead." and equally
tortuous things to avoid the difficulty of recreating believable swearing.

(I stole that sentence, by the way.  Sorry.)

Well, all you filthy minds, check this out.

Over in alt.folklore.urban, Harry Teasley is quoted as saying:

> All too often your predecessors in this area, whose tradition you uphold
> so well, proved to be nothing more than axe-grinding political reactionary
> inbred unthinking illogical cereberally-challenged knee-biter two-bit
> flame-throwing fight-starting loud-mouthed dipshit know-nothing lunatic
> impotent Tiberius moronic dumbfuck asshole loser no-date shit-for-brains
> cowardly crass tin-plated-dictator-with-delusions-of-manhood flaccid
> fatheaded needle-dick wimpy pimply facile Canadian bigoted mean
> small-minded dull cheap-shot-taking impolite pinheaded idiotic boring
> asinine oxygen-wasting braindead feeble sophmoric simplistic egocentric
> never-kissed-a-girl drooling clueless stuffed-shirt weenerbrane dittohead
> incapable-of-realising-no-one-gives-two-yanks-of-a-pig's-tit-what-their-
> politics-are black-helicopter-fearing Bircher obnoxious bad-beer-drinking
> hypocritical unread pesty churlish stupid self-righteous lame childish
> unlistening rude unquestioning Post-Virus-contributing nightmarishly-ill-
> informed pablum-puking cretinous hair-triggered obstinate intellectuallly-
> bankrupt unsound childish doltish mouth-breathing armpit-scratching
> knuckle-dragging hydrocephalic pontificating shrill easily-offended
> knock-kneed Gawd-help-us dotty puerile juvenile criminally-ignorant sorry
> loony screwball monstrous priggish fucking total wastes of time.

Now if _this_ isn't a good curse, I've never heard one.

© 1995 Peter Langston