Fun_People Archive
15 Oct
NTK bits, 1999-10-15
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From: Peter Langston <psl>
Date: Fri, 15 Oct 99 12:38:35 -0700
To: Fun_People
Precedence: bulk
Subject: NTK bits, 1999-10-15
X-Lib-of-Cong-ISSN: 1098-7649 -=[ Fun_People ]=-
X-http://www.langston.com/psl-bin/Fun_People.cgi
Excerpted-from: NTK now, 1999-10-15
_ _ _____ _ __ <*the* weekly high-tech sarcastic update for the uk>
| \ | |_ _| |/ / _ __ __1999-10-15_ o join! mail an empty message to
| \| | | | | ' / | '_ \ / _ \ \ /\ / / o ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net
| |\ | | | | . \ | | | | (_) \ v v / o website (+ archive) lives at:
|_| \_| |_| |_|\_\|_| |_|\___/ \_/\_/ o http://www.ntk.net/
"This year we updated the PowerBook in May, the iBook in
July, the G4 replacing the G3 in August at Seybold, and
now the iMacs in October. I added up the time: in 148 days,
we've completely changed every product."
- STEVE JOBS, TIME Magazine
...often by just lowering the CPU speed and hoping no-one would notice
>> HARD NEWS <<
nothing to lose
Two updates to last week's news: Lyndsay "Risk Digest" Marshall
wrote to point out a strong competitor for lamest Net story prize
to The Observer's white paper on virtual drugs in the News Of The
World. Extra points for a gratuitous Johnny Mnemonic mention, as
well as a full picture of his cybernetically-enhanced sidekick,
Professor Kevinny Warwic. And JO CHIPCHASE wrote in - for once,
not to ask for unpaid help on an article she's writing - but to
complain about the the poor taste of our Paddington coverage last
week. It's a fair cop (although in our defence, you should have
seen what we were *going* to write). Still, judging from the
non-reaction to our Springfield massacre funnies, time heals all
wounds. While we're waiting, we'll do the standard media trick of
pointing to other people's sick humour and tutting disapproval
while you forward it to your mates.
http://www.ntk.net/notw/
- rife with drug addicts and other sick individuals
http://stop.at/signal.109
- ban this evil Internet now!
>> ANTI-NEWS <<
berating the obvious
"more than 3000" Euro Dreamcast online registrations reported, 12
hours after going on sale - just 5,999,997,000 to go! ... "Password
Thief Ransacks AOL": purest antinews ... MICROSOFT writes report
using MICROSOFT WORD, crow Mac fans ... ZIFF DAVIS claims new
Pacman commercials feature "Verne Troyer, who played Mini-Me in
the latest Austin Powers flick and TV star Mr. T in the '80": don't
take steroids, kids ... disgruntled ex-Website of the week:
http://www.cdealer.com/ ... Symphony #1 for Dot Matrix Printers
[see NTK 1999-10-01] wins "Best Canadian work in the New Media
category" ... servers behaving badly:
http://www.comedyzone.beeb.com/m_behaving_badly/bbc/ .., Macintosh
app developers at MICROSOFT use Macs, crow Mac fans ... trains
not quite running to Internet time:
http://www.ntk.net/doh/19991015train.gif ... GUARDIAN recommends
sites with a "Secure Locket Layer (SLL)" - especially if you have
a cold ... DVD buyers search for "one, chosen model" that can play
THE MATRIX... LLOYDS TSB take unorthodox view of a good password
policies: http://www.ntk.net/doh/19991015tsb.gif ... "BUS PLUNGE",
screams the London Evening Standard: chalk one up for
http://www.users.interport.net/~tcs/ ...
>> TRACKING <<
making good use of the things that we find
So, you're an AMAZON ASSOCIATE too? What did you spend your profits
on? Beach-side condo? Original Leonardo sketches? A packet of
Monster Munch? Given that these online book stores can't even make
a buck on the other 85%, might it be a better idea to put your
pennies to work on something more worthwhile? Just like Amazon,
GIVEQUICK is a non-profit startup which redirects your affiliate
revenues to the charity of your choice. Admittedly, the choice at
the moment is very US-of-A-o-centric, but the kindly Webmasters
promise to introduce more "foreign" groups soon, and if you're a
British charity, I'm sure they'd oblige if you gave them a ping.
Note: BOL is not a charity. Despite appearances.
http://givequick.org/
- oh, please, it's the only cash we make...
>> MEMEPOOL <<
hasta la altavista
cable porn: http://www.rockers.nu/trams/banners/ ... you bet it
is: http://www.pak.gov.pk/ ... does the Vatican know about
http://www.netcraft.com/whats/?host=www.ntma.ie ? ... GARTH ENNIS
not in Paddington crash, contrary to Net rumours ... that's not a
coping strategy, that's a life skill:
http://www.unl.edu/conted/disted/hs/onehand.html ... it's official:
MICROSOFT WORKS now actively killing PENGUINS
http://www.newsunlimited.co.uk/g2/story/0,3604,91267,00.html IVAN
POPE now breeding hideous genetically-mutated super-warriors:
http://www.ntk.net/antipope/ ... DIY APPLE stories:
http://www.mired.com/mac/mac_10_08_1999.html ... DIY "have fun!
make money! sack everyone!" triumphs:
http://www.link.cs.cmu.edu/cgi-bin/dougb/recipe-ipo ...
>> SMALL PRINT <<
Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
It is registered at the Post Office as
"leaving every other word from our sentences"
http://www.oldmanmurray.com/guestbook.wc
NEED TO KNOW
THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK.
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(K) 1999 Special Projects.
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