Fun_People Archive
3 Apr
James Brown, playwright

Date: Mon,  3 Apr 95 17:57:24 PDT
From: Peter Langston <psl>
To: Fun_People
Subject: James Brown, playwright

Forwarded-by: rossen@lmis.loral.com (Tom Rossen)
Forwarded-by: LugieF@aol.com
From: SPY magazine (April, 1995)


Shades of Brown
PAPA'S GOT A BRAND NEW PLAY

The Godfather of Soul goes for his first Obie.

James Brown once claimed to have written 5,500 songs -- more than Mozart,
Beethoven, and Berlin. (According to researchers at BMI, the number is closer
to 600.)  In any case, The Hardest Working Man in Show Business has written a
hell of a lot of tunes.  When we examined his discography, we noticed that he
had given many of his songs titles that appear to be clipped from
conversation -- so many, in fact, that we were able to arrange an entire
one-act play using only song titles (written or produced by Brown) as
dialogue.  Even the play's title and the characters' names have been taken
from the discography.  Look for the debut somewhere off-off-Broadway soon.


                            WHERE THE SOUL TREES GROW

                             A play by James Brown
                    Arranged by Alex Gregory and Peter Huyck

SCENE:  STEVE SOUL (1969) and his wife, CALDONIA, (1964) are sitting on their
porch on a hot Georgia afternoon.  They are seated side-by-side in a swing
chair, facing the street.  CALDONIA is fanning herself and STEVE is gazing
across his lawn.

Caldonia:
There's Something on Your MInd. (1965)

Steve:
No, No, No. (1956)

Caldonia:
Tell Me What I Did Wrong. (1958)

Steve [turning away]:
It Hurts to Tell You. (1959)

Caldonia:
Gimme Your Hand.  Come On Wit' It.  Maybe I'll Understand. (1972, 1968, 1968)

Steve [pulls hand away]:
I Can't Stand Myself (When You Touch Me). (1967)

Caldonia:
I Won't Plead No More.  I'm Not Demanding. (1957, 1969)

Steve [explodes]:
Baby, Don't You Know?!  Papa Left Mama Holding the Bag! (1968, 1965)

Caldonia:
Slowdown.  Unwind Yourself. (1960, 1967)

Steve [takes a deep breath]:
I Found Out ... Annie Had a Baby.  Sweet Little Baby Boy. (1963, 1971, 1966)

Caldonia [leaps to her feet]:
It Was You?! (1959)

Steve:
Shhhhhhhh!  Tell the Whole World! (1968, 1967)

Caldonia:
Again!  [breaks into tears]  Tell Me Why!  Why Does Everything Happen to Me?
(1964, 1962, 1962)

Steve:
Oh Baby, Don't You Weep.  I Can't Help It (I Just Do-Do-Do). (1964, 1965)

Caldonia:
There Must Be a Reason -- What Kind of Man ... Keep On Doin' What You're
Doin'? (1959, 1968, 1971)

Steve:
Got No Excuse.  I'm a Greedy Man.  And I Do Just What I Want.  [looks off
wistfully into the distance]  Sometimes That's All There Is. (1965, 1971,
1960, 1980)

Caldonia:
I'll Never Let You Break My Heart Again. [she gets up, goes inside the house,
and comes back out, carrying a suitcase.]  I Won't Be Back. (1972, 1964)

Steve:
Baby Baby Baby.  Hold It. [jumps to his feet and takes her arm.] You Don't
Have to Go.  Stay with Me.  I've Got to Change.  I'll Work It Out.  Stop and
Think It Over. (1964, 1961, 1962, 1981, 1963, 1968, 1965)

Caldonia:
Tell Me What You're Gonna Do. (1964)

Steve:
I Need Your Love So Bad. [caresses her cheek.] I'll Be Sweeter Tomorrow.
(1975, 1969)

Caldonia [pushing him away]:
Sayin' It and Doin' It Is Two Different Things.  If You Want Me, You've Got
to Have a Job. (1972, 1961, 1969)

Steve:
I'll Lose My Mind! (1969)

Caldonia:
I Don't Care.  How You Gonna Get Respect? (1964, 1968)

Steve:
I've Got Money, Woman. (1966, 1973)

Caldonia:
Money Won't Change You.  I Don't Want Nobody to Give Me Nothing. (1966, 1969)

Steve:
Baby, You're Right.  I Love You, Yes I Do. [gets down on one knee and takes
her hand.]  Just You and Me, Darling. (1961, 1961, 1961)

Caldonia:
No More Heartaches, No More Pain? (1970)

Steve:
What Do I Have to Do to Prove My Love to You?  The Brother's Under Pressure.
(1968, 1974)

Caldonia:
Respect ... The Truth.  Make Up Your Mind. (1969, 1973, 1964)

Steve:
Try Me.  You're in Real Good Hands. [he smiles lovingly at her.]  You're So
Sexy. (1958, 1967, 1969)

Caldonia:
My Man.  I'm Back to Stay. (1964, 1968)

[They embrace.  He is looking over her shoulder in the direction of the
sidewalk.  At that very moment, a stunningly voluptuous woman walks by.
 STEVE's eyes bulge.]

Steve:
For Goodness Sakes, Look at Those Cakes! (1978)

Caldonia [slaps him]:
Get Out of My Life! (1969)

Steve:
Girl, Girl, Girl.  Please, Please, Please. (1970, 1956)

Caldonia:
You Can't Love Me, If You Don't Respect Me.  [she picks up her bags.]  When
Loneliness Knocks at Your Door, Can Your Heart Stand It?  [she starts down
the steps.]  So Long.  Write Me a Letter. (1975, 1964, 1981, 1964, 1964)

Steve [laughs mockingly]:
Talkin' Loud and Sayin' Nothing, Hot Pants.  It's a Man's Man's Man's World.
 You Know It.  Only You ... Never Find a Love Like Mine.  (1970, 1971, 1966,
1968, 1965, 1969)

Caldonia [pauses]:
I Know It's True. (1960)

Steve:
That's the Spirit.  Come Over Here. (n/a, 1960)

Caldonia:
Your Love Was Good for Me.  What a Feeling.  [She drops her bags and runs
back to him.] (1967, 1968)

Steve:
Get Up, I Feel Like Being A Sex Machine. (1970)

Caldonia:
[They start to unbutton each other's clothes.]  Bring It On ... Bring It On.
 I Feel That Old Feeling Coming On. (1983, 1956)

Steve:
I Got Ants in My Pants, I Want You So Bad. (1973, 1959)

Caldonia:
Release the Pressure!  Let the Boogie Do the Rest. [Lights dim and spotlights
focus on their faces as they fall to the floor of the porch.] (1976, 1979)

Steve:
Rock Me Again and Again and Again and Again and Again and Again.  Make It
Funky. (1974, 1971)

Caldonia:
The Spank, Mr. Big Stuff? (1978, 1976)

Steve:
Please, Please, Please ... Gimme Some More. (1956, 1971)

Caldonia:
Finger Poppin' Time! (1972)

Steve:
I Need Help (I Can't Do It Alone). (1970)

Caldonia:
Hang Ups We Don't Need -- Keep on Bumping Before You Give Out of Gas! (1970,
1974)

Steve:
Hot Pants, I'm Coming, I'm Coming, I'm Coming!  Here I Go! (1971, 1968)

Caldonia:
Let the Funk Flow ... [They collapse in a panting heap. Eventually, Caldonia
stands up and buttons her blouse.  Lights come back on.]  Sticky ... Cold
Sweat ... Let's Go Get Stoned. (1980, 1961, 1967, 1967)

Steve:
Sho' Nuff.  Papa's Got a Brand New Bag. (1973, 1965)

Caldonia:
I've Got a Bag of My Own.  Come On In This House... [She enters the house and
reappears, holding up a bag of unpopped microwave popcorn.]  Butter Your
Popcorn? (1972, 1968, 1969)

Steve:
[Gets to his feet and struts into the house.]  Let a Man Come In and Do the
Popcorn. (1969)

                                   [CURTAIN]

© 1995 Peter Langston